Rowing

So this past summer, I went to Dresden, Germany for a 2 month study abroad. It was by far the BEST experience of my life. Throughout the experience had a lot of time to think by myself and find ME. Now that I have been back in the states for a while, I find myself slowly continuing to fall and each time I do, I  lose a little bit of me. Look at the picture below. 

I took this in the Reichstag. It's in Berlin, and is like Germany's Congress building (at least that's how I would compare it.) To continue though, this is a thing of "art" within the Reichstag and it consists of 4 racing shells (8 person boats for rowing). You can't tell from the picture, but they are all bright colors like red, blue and yellow. The minute I saw this I couldn't keep my gasp in. I was ecstatic - to see rowing in a government building took my breath away. And my first thought was, "Where are the oars so we can take one of these babies out?!?" I missed rowing over that two month span. I would longingly look at the Elbe in Dresden, wishing I could take a shell out on it and feel that feeling of flying. I used to look at any source of water with that passion - longingly wanting to be in a boat rowing in complete unison with the 7 other rowers. Rowing was my LIFE. Just the mention of rowing and I would continue on for a minimum of 20 minutes telling you everything you couldn't possible want to know.

And then the next day, I went to the German Technology Museum in Berlin and came across the boats above. I was again ecstatic. 

But the story comes back to the present. I stopped rowing 2 weeks ago. I can't actually believe it's been that long. Everyday I think about it and the teammates I left. I thought of my time in Berlin and the excitement I had. When I saw the boats in the Reichstag, my friend David couldn't stop laughing at me, or the face I made from my astonishment. I guess I just want to say that I don't look at rowing the same anymore and that makes me sad. I can't even see to the day when I will. But I want to find that again - the pure joy I had with rowing - I would light up just by mentioning it. I want that back. I want to be excited again. I just don't know when that day will come. 

Anyways this is my first blog entry. I'm writing this in the hopes that it helps me find myself again. Lately, I've just felt really lost, and maybe by writing things down, I can figure things out again.